Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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