Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
did you just send me my own nude
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
