i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
