How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
