summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Randomize
