You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize