Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
