hell yes lets make some ravioli
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
