Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
It's like God shit irony all over that family
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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