And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
