Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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