there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
