Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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