We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
