So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
