i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
