the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
