Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
