Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
