Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
