Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Randomize