so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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