we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
