I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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