Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
