mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
