3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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