Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
id be glad to
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
