I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
