Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I understand Curling. That high.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
