whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
