So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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