I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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