Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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