What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Randomize
