I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
