Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
