My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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