ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
