An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
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