Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
My life is pants optional.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
