I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
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