i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I love having hate sex.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize