I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize