True but thats because hes a fetus.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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