i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
