my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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