I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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