brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize