I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
