ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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